Finding Your True Self, The Space Within
‘A Sioux friend told me:
The Creator gathered all of creation and said,
“I want to hide something from the humans until they are ready for it.
It is the realization that they create their own reality.”
The Eagle said, “Give it to me, I will take it to the moon”
The Creator said, “No. One day they will go there and find it.”
The Salmon said, “I will hide it on the bottom of the ocean.”
“No, they will go there too.”
The Buffalo said, “I will bury it on the great plains.”
The Creator said, “They will cut the skin of the earth and find it even there.”
Then Grandmother Mole….
who has no physical eyes but sees with spiritual eyes, said,
“Put it inside them, for that is the last place they will look,
….when they are ready.”
The Creator said, “It is done.”
The things we, truth seekers, do to find our true selves, or our true nature if you will.
We travel the world, we go through a zillion experiences, we meditate, we go out and seek for help to heal and fix ourselves, we try yet another method or technique to get to the bottom of a certain issue in order to eradicate it with root and all. We think our friends have the answer, or that experienced psycho therapist. We read self-help and self-development books. We vigorously practice yoga, we tap, we release trapped emotions, we dance naked round the fire, we sing mantras, we do tantra, you name it! The list is endless.
We all are on our own hero’s journey searching for the Wholy Grail. Our true nature.
Which is all great and part of the human experience. Some of us gradually get to discover and uncover glimpses of who we truly are, others have major breakthroughs, ‘see the light’ in unexpected ways and their lives are never the same.
I was that person, a so called truth seeker, searching high and low and I am very familiar with the feeling of being convinced of having found the key to lasting health and happiness in the latest method or technique I tried. But of course it didn’t last, so I went on to find the next and newest thing on the spiritual market to try out.
Until I got tired, tired of searching. I was tired of digging into the past and it’s hidden trauma’s, patterns and belief systems. I was tired of thinking positively, it took too much of my energy and it did not resolve certain feelings or episodes of mild depression happening from time to time.
I decided to drop it all and just follow my bliss. I uncovered the Manifestor in myself and felt empowered to create a business from scratch which resulted in facilitating 14 kids yoga trainings in 8 different countries within the space of 3 years.
On top of that I was teaching an average of 12 classes kids yoga classes a week, in schools, nurseries and my own community. I thoroughly enjoyed it all, it was great to see what the children and teachers got out of this and it gave me a great feeling to inspire other people to teach.
This experience gave me a great sense of what I was capable of doing and creating in this world. I felt I was doing something good in the world. I was living my passion. This was who I was.
When In doubt…
But I also grew tired of that. I wasn’t sure whether I still wanted to give it my ‘all’. Things stopped flowing. Classes didn’t fill with ease any longer and it seemed hard to get any participants in my trainings. It felt like I ran out of my magical manifestation powder. I felt I was losing or had already lost my passion for teaching.
This left me baffled and confused, for a while. Who was I without this? Had I not found my biggest passion in life finally, living who I was and sharing my gift with whom ever was willing to open it? Just to lose it again?
For a while, I didn’t want to do anything, I just wanted to relax and be. For a while I hardly saw any friends, I went on solitary walks in the forest every single day, I cooked and ate truck loads of warming and nourishing soup, I read a little here and there but not much really, I slept and rested a lot and I also was just dealing with the day to day stuff that comes with raising a child and living a family life. It was enough for me.
However, despite this little respite, my ‘smaller self’ wasn’t ready to fully own up to this desire ‘to do nothing’ and what did that mean anyway? And I certainly wasn’t ready to let go of my ‘career’ being a kids yoga teacher yet. I identified with what I did too much still. So I kept teaching classes and facilitating trainings the best I could.
But because it didn’t quite happen ‘in the flow’ any longer I had to work even harder, to keep it all going. I had to use a lot of my will power. At times, it felt I was flogging a dead horse. Everything in me was telling to stop, pause and re calibrate but my stubborn ego kept ‘hanging in’. Teaching Kids Yoga was who I was. And apart from that, it also gave me a good income.
In other words, I identified myself with what I was doing in life and what it was giving myself and others. I chose to ignore the soft whisper of Wisdom inside telling me to relax, to let go and set it free. This didn’t necessarily mean to quit teaching altogether, it was just trying to tell me to rest in what I had created, let it be and see what wanted to emerge from there by itself, without my empowered pro-active action interfering. In other words, it was telling me to take a step back and just watch…
The Space Within
During that time of rest and breathing space, taking my mind of the whole business, letting things be and allowing life to unfold by itself without me interfering, amazing things happened. Whereas I normally felt I had to actively ‘put it all out there’, work pretty hard, now new opportunities started to appear just by themselves. From out of nowhere.
For example, where I normally was pro-actively chasing schools or nurseries and offer my classes and programmes, without the desired results often, I now ‘out of nowhere’ had a School contacting me and hiring me to teach yoga to all year groups for an entire term.
‘Out of nowhere’ I was asked by a Life Coach whether I wanted to do one-to-one yoga sessions with his clients.
‘Out of nowhere’ I was called by an organization organizing retreats for companies to do yoga with their corporate groups. Suddenly I was teaching adults, not kids! Completely out of my comfort zone by the way.
As all these things seemed to appear ‘Out of Nowhere’ I started to get curious about where ‘Nowhere’ was!
Simultaneously, by chance, via an online parenting forum, I had bumped into the deeply transformative conversation about the Three Principles:
Universal Mind, Consciousness and Thought, the building blocks and spiritual gifts that enable us to see, feel and understand our True Nature and the true nature of the human experience.
Read the elaborate explanation in my blog : The Three Principles, The Psychological Trinity
Since being engaged in those transformative conversations with other parents, deep shifts within myself occurred just by itself, without me doing anything really other than Seeing and Understanding the truth of what I was hearing.
In a nutshell, I saw and understood that 100% of what we experience is created by our own thinking. Understanding this meant a 180 turn from thinking that what happened outside of me caused me to feel a certain way; circumstances, the weather, people, my family, etc. to seeing that it was the other way around.
Instead of the outside-in explanation of life, which is an off-the scale huge misunderstanding, I started to see and feel the power of the inside-out understanding of life.
‘You see, where we’re searching for is our home grounds – we’re searching to find the way home. And to find the way home, what you have to do is look at everything in reverse. Because naturally, if you’re away from home, if you keep walking, you walk further away. To find home you’ve got to turn round, and instead of searching outside for the answer you seek, all you do is look inside …and there lie the secrets that you want.’ – Sydney Banks
Alongside with this Insight, this ‘Seeing from Within’, I started to feel more aware and present. Thoughts, feelings, deep-seated beliefs showing themselves in repetitive thought patterns, my body chemistry, etc, all would appear to this feeling of ‘just being Aware’.
I started to get a sense of me NOT being my thoughts, feelings, beliefs or what I do, my money in the bank etc. but that what was present underneath all the noise of that chatter going on in my head. Something constant and never changing, something with great holding power, something eternally loving. Something from where my Wisdom and deeper feelings of love, peace and joy are arising.
Present Moment Awareness is our Home
When I started to learn about Universal Mind as an invisible and formless force or field and about Consciousness bringing everything in this world to life, including my thinking, I started to not only see but more so feel that it is Awareness that is our Home. The space within each one of us, which is the same space as the ever expanding Universal Mind ‘out there’.
This Space has got many names: some people called it The Source, others call it God or the Great Spirit. Or Divine Intelligence, The Infinite Power etc. It does not really matter what it is called, it all refers to the intelligent energy that powers everything alive on this planet. From our nails and hair growing to an acorn growing into an Oak tree.
It is the Space from where all things arise and to where everything disappears again. Including our thoughts! It is the vast space of the timeless Here and Now. The present moment. That is who we truly are, each and one of us. We are all one in this space.
Over time this Space, this Awareness or Consciousness gradually became more tangible for me. I felt a ‘settling’ going on inside me. A surrendering and settling into this Inner Space, as if settling and sinking into a big, comfy chair, deeper and deeper, meaning I felt more aware of this Inner Space on a deeper level in my experience.
I felt more and more aware of being aware, if that makes sense!
I would love to share with you the following short simplified story written by Michael Neill in his book ‘The Space Within’ because it illustrates so beautifully the universal journey we all go through as human beings:
The Story of ‘Me’
In the beginning there was a field of infinite possibility and pure potential called the Universal Mind:
Then, somewhere in the midst of the Universal Mind, the thought of you appeared:
That thought of you became conscious of itself and called itself ‘Me’.
For many years, Me lived and played happily in the midst of the garden of everything. But over time, it began to separate and individuate. It went to school and grew up to be an independent, free-thinking, empowered human being, making its way in the world, navigating by the rule book it had accumulated along the way and using discipline and willpower as its primary engine.
Me grew very strong and enjoyed flexing its muscles and developing its ‘personal power’. It forgot all about the Universal Mind that had once been its constant companion.
Eventually Me began to struggle, as all of us do. It was lonely, and felt insecure, and did everything in its power to make sure that no one ever saw through its facade. It wasn’t having a bad life, at least not some of the time, but something was missing.
Then one day, Me heard something called ‘the infinite’. It sounded very important and very grand, and the descriptions of the great peace that could be felt when one touched the infinite sounded like the most beautiful thing Me had ever heard.
But Me was too smart to fall for that one again. After all, the writers of the rule book inside Me’s head had already told it all about a supernatural being who lived in the sky. Since many of the things Me had been told after being born had turned out to be untrue, Me turned its back on its image of the infinite and carried in its own, struggling more and more but proud of its autonomy and ability to think for itself.
Until one day… Me met infinite. It looked nothing like the image Me had made up in its head, yet it seemed strangely familiar.
Much to Me’s surprise, the more time it spent with the infinite, the better life got. In fact, hanging out in the infinite felt like going home to a place Me didn’t even remember. Soon, Me and the infinite were spending nearly all of their time together.
Eventually Me began to think of itself less and less as ‘Me’ and more and more being a drop in the infinite ocean. Then one day, Me disappeared. Some said that Me had died, others that Me had become enlightened. But the infinite potential of the Universal Mind remained, and continues on to this day …
Living In The Flow
Being in this Inner Space of our true nature is feeling like being held all the time. No matter what we are thinking or doing, it is being held. We are being held by something endlessly strong and loving and something so much larger than ourselves.I never have felt more secure and safe.
I’ve come to the deep realization that feelings don’t need to be healed, they need to be held, they are held and allowed already within this space. When fully brought into the light of our Presence they let go of us. We don’t let go of them, they let go of us as a natural result of seeing and feeling them fully and whole-heartedly. We don’t have to resolve our feelings and make them go away.
There is no such thing as a solution to a feeling. Feelings are real. The thought that caused the feeling is NOT real. A thought is just a thought. We can choose whether to ‘purchase’, buy into this feeling, or not.
We can also choose to allow the thought to pass through the mind without ‘purchasing’. We don’t have to change or manipulate the thought. We notice, become aware and know that the thought is just a thought.
I’m aware when my thoughts, the thoughts of my ‘smaller self’ of my ego if you will, are obscuring this feeling of being home. Nothing else but my thinking is making me feel separate from home, my true self.
I can tell because my mind is cluttered versus being clear, worries start to bubble up and problems are made up simply by me using the power of thought in an unhelpful way.
Ever since this experience of resting and being in this Inner Space, I have noticed a shift in my feeling of resistance towards life. At times, I struggle with strong feelings of resistance, even towards things I supposedly love doing. I can’t explain it.
The underlying feeling is: I want to do nothing, let me be. It is so healing to just observe, welcome and allow such a thought or feeling we become aware of. All that comes into the Light of our Awareness will dissolve all by itself.
‘If the only thing people learned was not to be afraid of their experience, that alone would change the world.’ – Syd Banks
A shift was that my ‘doing’ or going about life or whatever you call it, was coming from this newly found and experienced Inner Space. I noticed that whatever I was doing it did not feel like a doing at all, it felt like just the natural flowing of life energy…like the flowing of a river.
As words are very limited here, I can only describe it being a very quiet and soft allowing from deep inside, an allowing of the natural unfolding of life from moment to moment. It made me realize that I don’t have to figure out my life and that I don’t have to force anything.
Wisdom is available from moment to moment and will guide us along, always. When our mind clears, wisdom appears.
So somehow the experience of this Inner Space of Love is melting away so much of my resistance to living life and taking and embracing life as it comes, from moment to moment. Being in the Here and Now, in this Space is so incredibly intimate, vibrant, powerful and liberating.
When hanging out in this space, it is like we can taste, smell and feel the texture of the IS-ness of everything. As if we are touching life itself, or life is touching us. There is an aliveness to each moment. A vibrant aliveness, no matter what we experience.
It reminds me of when I was a young child and feeling very connected to this pure and vibrant life inside me. It is that what is present in this moment, ….minus our thoughts. It makes sense doesn’t it? Young children don’t have piles of thinking going on. And look at our animals, …they don’t think at all. Pure awareness is what they are. This is why children and animals are such great teachers to us. They are living their true selves.
Discover a Spiritual Understanding that can
Transform Suffering Into Peace, Joy & Liberation
Not long after I got engaged in the transformative conversation about the three principles, my path crossed with spiritual teacher and transformative coach & consultant Joshua Benavides. He is the founder and director of Transformative Coach Institute.
I signed up for my Profound Wellbeing Coach Training at the Transformative Coaching Institute with Joshua Benavides because I felt a calling to grow and ground deeper into my understanding of the 3 universal principles that is transforming my life from the inside out, helping me to experience a deeper level of freedom, clarity and peace of mind.
I would love to invite you to get a taste of what I am pointing at in this article through experiencing Joshua’s FREE sample of his coach certification training. Nothing to lose, so much to gain…
Get FREE access
to a sample of his coach certification training:
You’re Going To Learn
- Three universal principles that, when understood, can raise your over-all level of consciousness and well-being
- How the full spectrum of the human experience is being created from the inside-out
- How you can tap into the deeper wisdom, love and intelligence behind life for deep transformation and healing (for yourself and others)
- How one simple shift in your understanding of how life works will allow you to experience unprecedented levels of freedom, clarity and peace of mind
Presented by Joshua Benavides
Joshua is the founder and director of Transformative Coach Institute. He’s the best-selling author of “Break The Worry Habit”, a transformative coach, consultant and spiritual teacher known for his kindness, humor and deep understanding of the ‘Inside-Out’ nature of the human experience.
His experience-based program teaches you how to develop a thriving transformative coaching practice focused on helping clients realize their potential and raise their consciousness and life.
The 6-month curriculum combines everything you would expect from a premium coach training program, plus time-honored spiritual development practices and cutting edge insights from quantum psychology, the ‘Three Principles’, A Course In Miracles, Mindfulness and more.
Finding Our True Nature Is The Key To Pretty Much Everything.
Understanding the three principles has changed and is changing my life from the inside out. Effortlessly. Without me having to figure out ‘what to do’ in my head. It has given me the ability to live my life from a Present Moment Awareness that allows my own inner wisdom to cut through the jungle of my personal thinking and guide me along my way in any given moment.
In this space we are already perfect, whole, and complete. It is a space of pure Consciousness – the space inside from where all thoughts arise and to where all thought disappear.
When we rest in the feeling of this space, the warmth of it heals our mind and body. When we operate from the infinite creative potential of this space, we produce high levels of performance and creative flow.
When we sit in the openness of this space with others, we experience a level of connection and intimacy which is breathtakingly enjoyable and filled with love.
When we explore this space more deeply, we’ll find ourselves growing closer and closer to the divine, even when you’re not sure there is such a thing and wouldn’t know how to talk about it if there were.
‘Every problem we have in life is the result of losing our bearings and getting caught up in the content of our own thinking; the solution to every one of those problems is to find our way back home.’ – Michael Neill in ‘The Space Within’
One problem. One solution. Infinite possibilities…
If you have any questions or would like to share something or if you need a hand in any way, please do leave a comment below.
Love & Blessings,
Founder of Young Yogis® Academy| Creator of Yogadance® Kids Method | (Kids) Yoga Instructor | Biodanza/Vitaldanza Facilitator | Waldorf Primary School Teacher | Teacher Trainer | Well-being Educator | Transformative Coach (in training) | Cat and Ice cream lover | Dutch | Traveling House sitter| Wife and Mother
Tags: insideoutunderstanding, mentalhealth, nonduality, profoundwellbeing, spiritualteachings, sydneybanks, theinsideoutrevolution, thethreeprinciples, transformativecoaching, transformativecoachinstitute